my rushmore

2009-08-19 11:36 p.m.

It's over. He was my Rushmore!

Jason Schwartzman got married.

The irrationally devoted and besotted fangirl in me died when she found out. As for the real me, what modicum of rationality I have is barely keeping me from sticking my head under the pillow and wailing. It's a small comfort to read the comments beneath the ONTD post that announced this death knell. All over the world, hundreds of geeky girls are numb with horror and pain.

I love him, and I want to mace this Brady girl in her lopsided face. It would have been better if she was a ridiculously gorgeous girl who couldn't be touched. Why does she have to be normal and taunt me, make me think... it could have been me!

So many woulda coulda shouldas...

I could have been Michael Cera's better, more tolerable Charlyne Yi...

Woody Allen's younger Soon Yi, more adept at English and without the Mia Farrow stigma...

Leonard Cohen's equally ethnic but paler and only too willing Anjani...

No psychological problems at all, nope.

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